Don’t text me when you’re bored or lonely. No seriously I mean it. Have you ever gotten a text from someone and had no idea who it was, because you had deleted that person’s number years/months ago because things never worked out? Well this too often happens to me. I don’t know what it is with some guys but I will date a guy or just talk to a guy and we won’t talk anymore for whatever reason and then boom I get that random hey whats up text (-_-). Who are you? No seriously who are you? Cause I am not the one you hit up when you are lonely or bored and I will call you out on it. Too many times people think that they can just hit you up out of nowhere because they need to be entertained. Well if this has ever happened to you I want you to tell that person to entertain themselves, go play with a yoyo and kick rocks with open toe shoes because you know your worth.
I am going to talk about two instances that happened in which I was completely puzzled. A few months back I got a text and it said “hey whats up Leslie”, I felt bad because I didn’t know who it was, and the person clearly knew who I was and I didn’t have the number saved. So I simply said “oh hey i’m sorry who is this”, the person automatically was like oh forget it etc. They got salty because I didn’t know who they were. Feeling like I may have really hurt someone’s feelings I thought long and hard, I finally figured out who it was and didn’t feel so sorry anymore. It was a guy that I used to talk to, who pretty much wasted my time and who I hadn’t talked to in literally a year and a half if not more. Who does that? I get it if we are friends and we just haven’t talked in a long time or maybe your regretting your past or w.e. But if that’s the case, call me, don’t text me and also if you didn’t treat me good before what makes you think I will just be so ready to jump when you say so. I am not the person that you call after scrolling through your phone while drunkenly reminiscing about the past and you yes YOU reading this shouldn’t be either because you are NOT THE BACK UP PLAN.
The other day I got a text from yet another number I did not know, from someone who I never actually dated or talked to. We met like once, exchanged numbers and nothing really happened and yet boom out of no where they wanted to know how I was doing after years. Pause, WHAT? What are you doing? Stop it! I wasn’t even mad, just a little annoyed. I am not the random booty call and I am not someone who is here to entertain you when you are bored. And you know what, I would appreciate it if people were just honest. I rather you tell me upfront honestly what you want instead of you “BS’ing” about it. This happened to one of my close friends. Some guy who it didn’t work out with had the nerve to hit her up on some “I’m lonely crap”. I appreciate his honesty but if it was me he would have got shut down right then and there. She proceeded to tell him that she had a boyfriend and then he pulled the you’re right I have a girl card too. Stop lying. The truth is he felt played and so he attempted to protect his integrity. But see the thing is his integrity died the moment he wrote “I’m lonely” after years of talking expecting her to jump cause he was now bored and available. The point of this post is to let you all know that you are worth so much more than a RANDOM text. And someone should contact you with true sincerity and not just for the sake of being entertained. Personally I rather someone call me, be real and not pretend like things didn’t hit the fan before. You are amazing, beautiful and a prized possession and don’t you everrrr forget it. Thanks for reading guys.
5 Unique Ways To Heal after a BreakUp:
I know what it is like to go through a break up in this article I have listed 5 unique ways to get over a breakup. I have heard many cliché ways on how to get over a breakup but I think it’s time to reinvent yourself…literally. Hope you like:
1- Go Salsa dancing, I am so serious, it is so fun and really opens you up. You dance with strangers who are just looking to have a goodtime and not worry about the pain from their past. Try it out
2- Watch, “Everybody Loves Raymond and the “King of Queens”- if this doesn’t make you laugh till your belly hurts, then I don’t know what to tell you lol. Seriously try it out
3-Buy an outfit that makes you feel sexy- it will really make you feel great about yourself and then you can look at yourself in the mirror and realize you are so much better without them : )
4- Go to an amusement park and get a sundae, I love amusement parks and well they make me happy- try it out
5- Go on vacation with some friends and realize the world is so much more than a broken relationship. Sometimes people are only there to teach you one thing, we mess up when we confuse seasonal people with lifetime people. Accept the universe and party like it’s 1999 or just do all the things that make you happy and smile.
Thanks for Reading
5 signs your significant other is in it for the long haul:
So you’ve been dating your significant other for a little bit of time now and maybe your not so sure where the relationship is going. Or maybe you just want to make sure this isn’t just another fling. Here are some signs that definitely show that your significant other is in it for the long haul:
You have met the friends and family. I cannot stress this one enough. If someone is really into you and they want things to work long term they are going to want you to meet the most important people in their lives, whether it be family or friends. I know if I met the guy of my dreams and we were seeing each other I would definitely introduce him to my family, and I rarely do that, so If I do introduce a guy it means its serious.
You are a part of their long term plans. Does he or she mention your name when they talk about where they see themselves in a year or future endeavors. If someone incorporates you into their future life that hasnt even occurred yet, chances are they are taking you and your relationship pretty seriously.
If both of you are comfortable with talking about marriage or living together then chances are you guys are open to long haul capabilities. : )
He or she doesn’t flirt with anyone but you, and only has eyes for you. When you are together it’s like no one else is in the room, and when you are not together they make it known that you are a part of their life.
If their coworkers know about you, that means they talk about you and they don’t want you to go anywhere.
I hope you guys enjoyed!! Have anymore signs to add, send them to firstname.lastname@example.org
Thanks for reading guys!!
3 Ways to Keep Him Interested
Sometimes after being in a relationship for a long time things can get repetitive and monoutous. And sometimes men lose interest. Here are some things that you can do to keep him interested or keep the relationship alive.
1) Surprise him. Guys love when you change it up. Unpredictability is sexy. For example: Create a romantic setting/sexy occasion, cook him dinner one day, send him a sexy gift, write him a song, and do it all just because- this will keep definitely keep him interested, guys like mystery, but not too much.
2) Give him time to miss you. Now I am not an advocate for games in which you wait 2/3 days to call, but I think it is always nice to spend time doing stuff with your friends and for yourself and then coming back to your significant other. Distance definitely makes the heart goes fonder.
3) Take him out somewhere different that you haven’t gone too, or some place that you don’t normally go. For example: a broadway play, a live show, a concert, laser tag, beach, picnic, fireworks, exotic cuisine. Or even surprise him with two tickets to his favorite basketball team’s game etc – he will love that you care enough about his interests and not just your own
3 Ways to Keep Her Interested
Sometimes after being in a relationship for a long time things can get repetitive and monoutous. And sometimes women lose interest. Here are some things that you can do to keep her interested or keep the relationship alive.
Surprise her. I cannot stress this enough, women love surprises and even if they say they don’t they do. But it has to be a well thought out surprise. For example: cook her dinner one day, send flowers to her job, write her a song, and do it all just because- this will keep definitely keep her interested, in fact she might be smitten
Give her time to miss you. Now I am not an advocate for games in which you wait 2/3 days to call, but I think it is always nice to spend time doing stuff with your friends and for yourself and then coming back to your significant other. Distance definitely makes the heart goes fonder.
Take her out somewhere different that you haven’t gone too, or some place that you don’t normally go. For example: a broadway play, a live show, a concert, laser tag, beach, picnic, fireworks, exotic cuisine
Make Time or End it….
One thing I cannot stand are excuses. When it comes to a relationship there is no such thing as too busy and anyone who tells you different is lying. I was able to maintain a relationship while being a double major in college, a resident assistant, in a choir, and in other school activies at the same exact time. I always make time for those who are important to me and if your significant other is not making time for you or making efforts to do so it is time to end your relationship. I have seen people within long distance relationships make time for someone they love who aren’t even around so there is no excuse for making the time. A relationship is all about compromise and circumstance and if you cannot do either one even if you work crazy hours or have many obligations then you do not belong in a relationship. If when it comes to your relationship you have to think hard about squeezing in 30 minutes just to hear your significant other’s voice then your relationship is doomed and you should really prioritize your schedule or walk away. It is as simple as that. Make time or End it because no one wants to come 3rd or 4th place in your list of priorities and if you value what you have with someone you will work hard to maintain it. One song that comes to mind when I think of making time in a relationship is the classic 702 song entitled, “Make Time.” I love this song and you should definetely check it out. Please send me your opinions and your feedback. Have you ever been in relationship in which you just didnt have the time or your significant other just wouldnt make time for you? How did that make you feel and did you do anything to resolve the issue. I would love to here from you and Thanks for reading.
For those of you reading this wondering what the hell am I talking about, let me first define the acronym DTR. DTR stands for………: define the relationship. For those of you that watch “Awkward” on MTV (an awesome show) you already knew that but for those of you that haven’t seen the show, I think you should watch it lol. But anywho that is not what this article is about. I want talk about when you should define a relationship and when you shouldn’t. A lot of people say, “I hate labels and why complicate things”, but I think you complicate things when you don’t even know what things are. And the moment you start having guidelines and rules for what is and isn’t okay you are already defining what it is you are doing within itself, so why not DTR? I’ll tell you why, if the person you are “talking” to isn’t treating you right then chances are in a relationship they won’t treat you much better. I mean of course if you aren’t someone’s official significant other you might not experience the full benefits of girlfriend or boyfriend status but you should have an idea of what’s to come. Honestly, in the words of Maya Angelou, “if a person shows you who they are, believe them.” If someone lies to you in the beginning, that’s a bad sign. I believe in second chances but I also believe in honesty. Relationships require just that, honesty and if you don’t start on a strong foundation how on earth will you last? You won’t, simple as that. And a small lie can become a big lie, and a small lie makes me think, “why did he feel he had to lie about that”. In fact it makes me feel like that person doesn’t trust me, and you absolutely cannot have a relationship without trust. So my point is at this point is if you and your current interest are not fully honest with each other and do not fully trust each other do not DTF, or for better words do not get into a relationship. In fact walk away if it’s been awhile and you are still unsure. Love is a lot of things, but one thing it is definitely not, is unsure. Which leads to my next point, are you comfortable with each other? And this is after being comfortable fully with yourself. Do you guys feel comfortable enough around each other to just open up, and be yourselves? If the answer is no, or I am not there yet, you are probably not ready to DTR. Also be true to yourself, if what you are involved in is a fling then make sure both parties are aware of that, so no one gets hurt. The worst thing is to think your in a serious relationship with someone and then to find out that in fact they are seeing other people and not claiming you. If anything you should probably always define the nature of your relationship. But when it comes to actually officially deciding on when you should be in a relationship that’s when you have to take into account a lot of different things such as;
honesty, trust, openness, level of comfort, are you a secret? Are you just in it for the physical? All of these things play an important role in DTR’ing lol. Thanks for reading guys
Going the distance:
There is no doubt about it that long distance relationships are no easy feat. In fact they take a lot of energy and effort so it’s only natural to feel apprehensive about choosing to “go the distance.” I have to admit after having being in a few long distance relationships I had deemed them not for me and had conformed to a “JUST SAY NO” policy, but after research and talking to a few people currently in long distance relationships I have pulled a 360 and have changed my mind. If you are considering starting a long distance relationship with someone I think it is important to know what you and your interest long term and short term goals. This is extremely important. Here are some pros and cons when considering a long distance relationship:
-You get to know a person on a more personal level without relying heavily on physical interaction. In fact circumstance causes you to really dig deep and know a person’s true character which actually takes longer when you are in close proximity. When you are constantly videoing chatting or on the phone with a person it forces you to open up eventually and know all those things that really matter within a relationship
You can maintain your own individuality and use your time to be very productive.
It forces you to incorporate unique ways to express how you feel since you are not always together
It requires a lot of determination and devotion so it can create a very solid foundation and you can insure that the person you are with is really into you.
After long periods without seeing your significant other it will feel like heaven on earth and you will really cherish the times that you share together
You become very comfortable with a person without having to deal with physical tempations that can really interfere with truly knowing if you are compatible with a person for who they are and not just what they look like.
You have to develop a huge level of trust because you are not in the same area and without it, it can cause a huge strain.
It really sucks not seeing the person you care about for long periods of time. Sometimes you want more than a phone call or video chat, which is very normal.
It takes a lot of time and energy but so does any relationship
Depending on your visiting schedules and locations it can be costly, so make sure the person you choose is worth it
You can feel lonely at times
I am currently in a long distance relationship and while it is hard not seeing my boyfriend for long periods of time, I have never been happier and the times we do share together mean that much more. I feel I know him very well and that I am getting to know him on a much deeper level than I ever was with any of my other local relationships which as helped us grow a very deep bond and helps us to grow together everyday. I felt my boyfriend was worth it so I decided to go the distance, make sure to really weight the pros and cons before you do so. While long distance relationships are not for everyone it can lead to a very wonderful relationship in which you and your partner are in the same location one day. Thanks for reading. Please send me your long distance relationship stories, I would love to hear about them.